Confession Time

I have been reading through the Gospel of Matthew these days with my six year old son. We spend about ten to fifteen minutes each evening to read a few paragraphs (ESV Bible) and talk about what we read. I am sure many Christian families share similar experience each evening.

I was struck with a difficulty: my son is gradually losing interest in the stories we are reading. He doesn't really look forward to the bible reading time. Without the color pictures, there isn't much to get him particularly excited. He was much more excited when we were reading an abridged children Bible. What am I doing wrong? Despite the good intention of steering my child to the Word, is the reading time doing the opposite of turning him away? Isn't this something that you experience yourselves?

Here we are: reading the miracles Jesus performed and listening to His parables. Why isn't the Word drawing our soul and mind to God? The problem, I surmise, is not with God or His Word. Rather, modern readers like myself have a very different mindset than the ones sitting at Jesus' feet at His time.

The fact of the matter is: modern readers are not sitting at His feet listening to Him and watching His every gesture. We are just treating the reading time as a chore. It is just one of a million activities that we "have to" get done before we hit the sack. When we pick up the Book, it is at a time most comfortable and convenient for ourselves and we sit there with a full stomach and a cup of hot milk, ready to be carried into sweet dreams and a good night rest. We do this day in and out with only one wish: please keep it short and sweet.

Unlike the first century followers, we aren't spiritually thirsting or starving for the Word. No, we are just trying to earn our own salvation by works. In this case, daily reading of the Word becomes a means to earn merit. It is a way for us to boast our spirituality. I read my Bible everyday. Do you?

Despite the outward appearance, I hardly connect our reading with our lives. For instance just a couple of nights ago, after reading Peter asking the LORD to let him walk on water, we just turned off the light and went to bed without nary a thought of asking for better and greater things for His sake. We slept soundly in His care without questioning our lack of faith thereof. How was that a way to internalize what we read? How was that thinking God's thought after Him? As Christian parents, am I modeling Christ in my Bible reading habits before my children?

Indeed may the LORD grant us all a heart of flesh to worship and adore Him every time we approach His Word. Lord, forgive us of our lack of faith. Draw us near that we may learn from you our master and King. Stand up our ears that we may hear your voice with our heart. Give us the thirst and longing to learn with our minds. Nourish our soul as we feast on the life-transforming Word. Stand us firm by your Spirit in your Word that we may live for your glory. Add to this our little faith that we may draw others to your grace.

Pray. O my soul, pray.